Can a person be too nice? Yes, and you should stop being that person… unless you want to be a saint, but in that case you can’t have a girl. Problem solved.
In a previous post I confessed that I have a tendency to be too nice, specially with girls. But is it possible to be too much of a nice guy?
While the nice guy is an agreeable person, he’s got no control over his life. He allows women to come into his life, he agrees on everything, and hopes and prays that these women will like him for being so agreeable. (…) He becomes the boring nice guy nobody wants to date.
Really? Does that mean that you have to be a jerk to be loved? Well according to this parody song, you should:
You only date bad guys so,
I’ll give my best try to
Treat you the way you want me to
I never open a door or pull out a chair
You can tell me how was your day but I don’t really care
And if you ever get cold, you just have to bear it,
’cause I would be cold too if I gave you my jacket
That song is hilarious but obviously you shouldn’t be a jerk; you should find balance. When you sacrifice most of your interests and personality to please a girl, when you constrain or adapt your actions to look nice to a girl, and you do so constantly, you’re being too nice.
You know what you’re also being? Fake. You’re trying to be nicer than you really are, just to please her. And if you’re trying that hard that’s because she doesn’t notice you.
That girl clearly likes two things in a guy: looks, money. I don’t see where “nice” fits in to that list. (…) You’re chasing cars, but you don’t know what to do if you get one. Jenna Marbles
Probably you’re attracted to that girl for the wrong reasons. Probably she’s one of those barbie girls that enters the room and makes all boys drool, and you’re just one of those boys. Look at her, enjoy the sight, carry on.
“Leagues” do exist, so play on yours. Don’t search for the perfect girl, look for a girl that fits you, that complements you.